Anti-sex measures at the Olympics include bunk beds, “awareness” condoms to take home.

Spoiler alert: These do not go to the countries of origin.

Spoiler alert: These do not go to the countries of origin.
Image: Shutterstock

Sex at the Olympic Village is a talking point at all Games, as if somehow it’s surprising that a bunch of young, hot, athletes from all over the world have a habit of getting along with members of the tiny subgroup of people who can connect with their very interesting and unique experience of reaching the Olympics.

All in all, it’s amazing that there wasn’t even a reality show at the Olympic Village. Maybe when it comes to MTV The Challenge does it become an Olympic sport?

The organizers of the Tokyo Games have a challenge on hand, as they seek to somehow pull off the illusion of a safe, socially distant, disease-free Olympic experience. So: No nookie, please.

Geniuses trying to drag an Olympics into a pandemic are now announcing it. ”anti-sex bedsFor the Olympic Village, which is falling under too much weight, even distributing it condoms to athletes, “To help with awareness-raising by taking them back to their countries.”

You can only imagine the athletes in the Olympic Village now, right?

“Hello, fellow Olympic athlete.” I think you are very attractive. ”

“Delightfully, you’re also attractive to me, and here we establish a connection that is both physical and based on our common bond as an Olympian.”

“Would you like to have a little bit of that Olympic Village sex that everyone talks about?”


“Wait, we can’t.” The bed will break. ”

“That’s right. In addition, these condoms are supposed to come back with us in our home countries, to raise awareness. It would be wrong to use one for sex here. ”

“Yeah, and we can’t have sex without a bed.”

“Oh well, it was a good idea.”

“Yeah, see you in four years, maybe!”

No, they have to fuck.

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